


You don't have to stay

by chickentine



Series: Tumblr Angst Prompts [2]
Category: Figure Skating RPF
Genre: F/M, Tumblr Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-07
Updated: 2014-10-07
Packaged: 2018-02-20 05:51:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,544
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2417333
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chickentine/pseuds/chickentine
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Or, the Three Times Meryl Stayed and the One Time She Didn't. </p><p>A Tumblr Angst Prompt fic for Potatoholic</p>
            </blockquote>





	You don't have to stay

**Author's Note:**

> I've posted this on tumblr, in response to the Tumblr Angst Prompts. Potatoholic sent in "you don't have to stay" for Meryl/Charlie and this grew into something a bit bigger than a drabble.
> 
> Posting this for those who are more inclined to the AO3 medium!

1.

Meryl visited Charlie the day he came home from the hospital. Jacqui’s fond, exasperated face met her in the front door.

“You didn’t have to come, Meryl. That boy needs a lesson or two.”

“I know, Aunt Jacqui – ”

“ – _Jacqui – ”_

“ – Jacqui. But he’s my partner and well, I know he’s pretty bored there, isn’t he?”

Jacqui sighed. “He sure is. He’s not saying anything, but I know he’s hollering for you deep down.”

Meryl walked through the door and was halfway to their den when Jacqui called out. “Meryl? Give him a good talking-to for me. He needs it.”

Smiling, Meryl gave a nod and walked in.

Charlie was lounging on the couch, leg encased in a cast as he stared morosely at the television set on a _Full House_ rerun. By the set of his jaw, Meryl knew he wasn’t really giving the show his attention.

“Hey, stranger”

Glancing up, Charlie brightened considerably. “Hey, Mer.”

He scooted over to the best of his ability, making room for Meryl to sit on the couch.

The space was inviting – _Full House_ was inviting – but Meryl knew there were things to be said. And she _promised_ – albeit wordlessly so – Jacqui. 

“I heard how you broke your ankle.”

Charlie groaned. “Mer – ”

“Casual hockey? _Really?_ ”

“Alright, that was really irresponsible of me and more people could’ve been hurt and _yes,_ I could’ve been hurt more and I’m pretty lucky with this and I’m _sorry,_ Mer.”

Meryl’s face was unreadable.

“Charlie, that was really stupid of you.”

Charlie sighed. “I _know,_ Mer.”

“And,” she quivered. “We’re down for a season, do you realize that?”

Charlie blinked. Meryl snorted and marveled at the _stupidity_ that could reside on such a brilliant, intelligent _boy._  

Slowly, a thunderstruck look of horror was dawning on Charlie’s face.

“It could’ve been our first season as seniors, remember? We were learning new lifts and we were supposed to learn a new one on Monday. _Charlie,_ why?”

Charlie looked so _distraught,_ Meryl felt her heart breaking a bit for him. But she wasn’t done, not yet.

“I’ll be perfectly honest with you. I came here because I wanted to find out if, well, you’re still up for ice dancing. I really _love_ skating, Charlie. I love skating with _you.”_ She paused, seeing Charlie’s expression shift to urgency. “I know, Charlie, I know. But I was just so _hurt_ that you would go and play casual hockey and be so rough about it a few months before our possible seniors’ debut. I mean, does our partnership not mean enough? And look at you, you’re practically immobilized for six weeks!”

“ _Please don’t leave me,_ ” Charlie said so quietly, Meryl barely heard him. But she did.

“I’m not – I’m not leaving you, Charlie. In our partnership, I mean. I’ll wait for you. Maybe I’ll spend this gap year away from skating and I don’t know, get a head start with my academics. But you – you have to promise this won’t happen again.”

Charlie looked up. Meryl felt rather guilty. She had come and Charlie was quite possibly expecting a friendly visit but had gotten a reprimand instead.

“I promise, Mer,” Charlie said so earnestly, so _sincerely,_ that Meryl had to suppress a grin of relief.

 _But does he really want it?_ She sighed and shifted uncomfortably.

“ _You don’t have to stay,_ ” Charlie said brokenly, eyes shifting downwards and hands fiddling in his lap.

It felt like an answer and a question at once. Meryl smiled, plopped herself on the floor, back resting on the couch near Charlie’s head. She felt his incredulous, disbelieving stare.

“But I will.”

 

2.

“ _It’s my fault._ ”

“It’s not, Charlie.”

“I’m the weak link.”

“You’re not, Charlie.”

“Everyone said so.”

“Don’t listen to them, Charlie.”

“I could’ve dropped you!”

“But you didn’t, Charlie.”

“I fell three times!”

“You got up three times too, Charlie.”

“I’m a disaster.”

“ _You’re not, Charlie._ ”

“You should leave me. Find a better partner.”

“ _I’m not doing that, Charlie.”_

 

Silence.

 

“ _You don’t have to stay.”_

“But I will, Charlie.”

 

Longer silence.

 

“Thank you, Mer.”

“Anytime, Charlie.”

 

3.

Charlie supposed it was normal. After all, how were long-term _romantic_ relationships supposed to last without a fight every now and then?

This one felt so _horrible,_ however. Voices were raised, the door was slammed, and old issues and even old _relationships_ brought to stark, unforgiving light.

It was rather overwrought to say that it felt like his world was ending, but it did.

So he did the only thing he could think of.

He called Meryl.

\---

Meryl bemoaned her fate as she sat with Charlie, listening to him pour out his heart and soul about all his insecurities, all his _feelings_ about a relationship she was so _wary_ of in the first place. She was joyous, glad, _relieved,_ touched when Charlie called her up asking for her company. He said he needed her. So she went.

She should’ve known that it was going to be about _this._

How was she supposed to react? The man she’d been harboring some undetermined feelings for was now talking to her about the depth of his love for another woman, the yearning to fix things between them, the frustrations that came with any long-term relationship.

Charlie was her friend, first and foremost. But sometimes, _sometimes_ she wondered _how._

He must have sensed her agitation. He sighed, looked up rather guiltily.

“It’s okay,” he said. “You don’t have to stay.”

Meryl scolded herself inside. This was _Charlie._ And he was worth throwing away all sense of self-preservation.

“But I will, Charlie.”

 

0.

It was rather painful to be in a tight-fitting, slightly itching formal gown, heaping plates of food before her, feet uncomfortably encased in sparkly stilettos on a grass-covered lawn on a fine spring day, and watching, _watching_ her childhood best friend – her ice dancing partner for eighteen years, her prom date a decade earlier, the man with whom she had won an Olympic gold medal – delicately feed his wife with some fancy red-velvet cake with expensive, exquisite frosting off his fork on the big table up front.

It was odd, really, how everything seemed to come down to this.

Despite Charlie’s pleas to make her his best man, Tanith had put her foot down. Meryl was one of the bridesmaids, dressed in the same pale blue long gown with some questionable hip cleavage. The ceremony had gone without a hitch. DJ and Finn “gave” Charlie away, there were some tears shed as they read their vows – Tanith had opted for a long message of her enormous love and Charlie went with a brief poem, culled from Meryl’s extensive collection – and the reception had gone off smoothly, the cake cut, the champagne bottles popped, the traditional games played, and the couple coerced to kiss a couple more times.

Meryl had felt an odd sense of calm throughout the ceremony. She did not, as she briefly considered in her wildest, most secret moments, stand up when the pastor called out for those who may oppose the marriage. She did not, as she feared she would, cry silently into her handkerchief and ruin her carefully-done makeup. She walked down the aisle, hand looped on Alex’s elbow, with a winning smile. She had held the train of Tanith’s gown, nodded her support as she got ready that morning, and sincerely admired the reception decorations – all rather tastefully done in some spring-floral theme.

But she would be desperately lying to herself if she said she was _happy._ It was difficult to be happy on such a joyous day. It was difficult to be happy even when the sun shined brighter than it had all week. It was difficult to be happy even with impending training sessions in three weeks. It was difficult to be happy even when everyone had complimented her hair and makeup. It was difficult to be happy when _her best friend was marrying another woman._ It was difficult, so _utterly_ difficult, to be happy when the man she had loved so fiercely, secretly, desperately for the last five years had just wed the woman of his dreams and was now in her arms _forever._

“Say Something” played over the speakers and Meryl, eyes turning downward at the pattern of their tablecloth, cursed the awful song choice, the growing heat of the fine spring day, her life, her inability to _say something_ now, or even at any point over the last five years.

How, indeed, could she live with herself now?

She looked up again, just in time to see Charlie smile at Tanith the same way he smiled at _her_ countless times over countless rinks, back when Meryl could let herself believe, in the space of four minutes, that he _could_ be in love with her. That there was a part of him, deep down, that knew he had something to say as well. 

“You don’t have to stay.”

It was Maia, who looked at Meryl with a mixture of worry and pity and _sadness._

Meryl swept one last look at the newlyweds, both with their hands intertwined on top of their table, still _smiling_ at each other.

“You’re right,” she said. “I don’t.”

She stood up and walked out of the large tent and into the sunlight.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> It's not angsty-angsty, but I hope you guys liked it! :)


End file.
